When Well-Meaning Parents Impose…

A colleague sent me this scenario, wondering how all of you instructors out there would have handled it:

A little 5-year-old girl walks out onto the mat to start class. She has been in the dojo for 9 months already. Today, her mother follows her, holding a medium-sized stuffed animal. The mother says, “Mr. Cloud will watch you from here,” and she starts to put the stuffed animal on top of a pile of kicking targets that are on the mat. As the instructor, how do you respond?
A) No, I think Mr. Cloud will watch you from the visitor area with mom.
B) Oh, look we have another student for today! Hello Mr. Cloud.
C) [fill in your response here].

Personally, I’m pretty strict and serious about the training area, so I know my first impulse would be to do something like A) – although I would try my best to be gentle and courteous with the parent. B) has possibilities, though…

How about the rest of you? I’m very curious to hear. And my colleague won’t reveal how he or she handled the situation until we hear from some of you, so please post your thoughts!

Celebrate Kids Who Train in Martial Arts

Updated January 14, 2010

photo by Linda Nikaya

Happy New Year, everyone!
Let this be the best year yet for your training.
May you build strength, stamina, discipline and focus.
May you feel the joy of good health and physical expression.
May you have more fun than ever, pursuing an art that provides such serious benefits in your life. Have some serious fun.

Let’s celebrate in pictures. Send me a great picture (or two) showing kids in action, training in martial arts. Include appropriate credits (your school and instructor, and the photographer’s name). We’ll add it to the photo gallery here on this site. Pass the word to anyone you know who teaches martial arts to kids– or who has kids who train in martial arts.

A few folks have already responded– I have some pictures from Germany as well as the U.S. Let’s get as many schools, styles, states, and countries on here as we can!

Send your photos to photos@kidskaratebook.com. I look forward to seeing and posting them!

A Book for Karate Moms and Dads, Kids of All Ages

When I tell people I’ve written a martial arts book for kids, often their first question is “What age group did you write for?” The publisher has categorized the book for ages 9 to 12; however, I have a much different view of the matter.

I believe kids of all ages can benefit from the book. It has over 200 illustrations, and these can be enjoyed– and even, if you like, colored in– by younger readers who aren’t yet ready for the sentences and vocabulary.

More importantly for the younger kids (age 5 & up), their parents can benefit from helping them read the book. In fact one of the main reasons I began the project was that parents of younger students asked time and again for such a book– something that would help them understand what their children were learning, so they could be supportive of their practice at home. They wanted a book they could enjoy together with their children while learning about martial arts.

The more parents know about their children’s training, the better they can support it. I think most instructors would agree with that. Parental support is a key factor in success. Parents shouldn’t try to take the place of the instructor, but they should try to understand what the instructor wants from the student. Then they can be supportive in appropriate ways.

And what does the instructor want from the student? Instructors want kids and parents to know that karate and taekwondo are fun, but they’re also serious. They require commitment, dedication, exactness, and an ongoing desire to improve. The great thing is that these are all “attitudes for success” that will help kids in many areas of life.

Commitment, dedication, seriousness– those are big words for 5-year-olds. But they’re important lessons kids start on as soon as they start school. And they are at the heart of martial arts. So if a child is old enough to be in a martial arts class, they’re old enough to begin learning about those ideas (in age-appropriate terms, of course!).

I’ve never gone wrong by taking kids seriously and letting them aim high. In all the years (more than twenty) I’ve been teaching ages 5 & up, I’ve avoided talking down to my youngest students. Sure we have fun, we sometimes laugh, and the youngest go at a different pace from the older kids. But we are all learning the same lessons, and working on the same material– the material of martial arts. Martial arts is an individual pursuit where every student, regardless of age, must proceed at his or her own pace.

I’ve written my book in the same way, as a handbook for all ages that doesn’t talk down to anyone. Students must use it at their own speed and in their own way– with the help of instructors, the help of their parents, and when they’re old enough, on their own.

Click here to buy from Amazon, or ask for the book at your local bookstore:
The Kids’ Karate Workbook: A Take-Home Training Guide for Young Martial Artists